The Meal Planner Returns

Hope everyone had a wonderful Shavuos.

To review how we will start with successful meal planning...

Start a permanent list of meals that are tried-and-trues. The ones your family eats. Don't add the recipes you saw in the magazine, which looks great, but you've never tried. You need to have made it AT LEAST twice (with most of your family eating AND enjoying it) before it becomes a tried-and-true.

Here's some from the Feldman Master Dinner List:

-Spaghetti and Meatballs/Meatsauce, and salad
-Turkey burgers, rice, and green beans
-Spinach souffle, soy nuggets, and baked potatoes
-Pizza and cut up veggies
-Tuna croquettes, macaroni and cheese, and salad
-Roasted chicken, couscous, and cauliflower

You get the idea. Make your own list. Next step coming soon.

Hiatus

I have been touched by the e-mails I have gotten from a bunch of people saying they missed my posts. It was quite flattering.

But when my mother sends me an e-mail this morning saying that she is missing my blog (and I talk to her everyday), I had to respond.

After Pesach, I followed through on a commitment I had made to myself to start incorporating exercise into my daily routine.

This may not sound like that big of a deal, but for me it was huge. I have started and stopped so many attempts at exercise, that for this resolution to stick, I had to put it first. Which means I had to take out some of my other activities in the evening. Combined with the fact that my 3 year old has been going through sleeping issues (this is putting it mildly), my time was more limited than usual.

I am happy to say that I have been successfully going to Curves 3 times a week since Pesach ended. It's been a really great option for me, and dare I say - it's been fun??!!

Now I am happily cooking and preparing for Shavuos. But after Yom Tov ends, I plan on resuming my blogging. I will pick up where I left off with meal planning.

I wish everyone a wonderful and meaningful Shavuos, and look forward to continuing after!

What's for Dinner?

I didn't want a whole week to pass without posting...

It was such a busy week, it had the feel of the pre-Yom Tov frenzy. I think it's just getting back into the routine that takes some adjustment.

Last night we celebrated the marriage of our cousin, Meira. It was a beautiful wedding with a beautiful chassan and kallah. Today, we are off to Baltimore for Shabbos Sheva Brochos, and then Sunday we have Sheva Brochos at our house. I think that also explains the hectic week.

As promised, we will begin with meal planning. On my first post to this blog, I wrote the following about one feature of a happy home:

It's when the kids come home at the end of the day and they ask you "What's for Dinner?" - and you ACTUALLY have an answer for them, AND it will be able to be served before those same kids start eating the expensive "school only" snacks you just bought from Costco, AND you don't need to go to the store first to get the ingredients to make that dinner.

Putting dinner on the table night after night is a daunting task. It feels never-ending, and truthfully, it really is. It's one of those it's-really-a-bracha-to-have-a-family-to-have-to-serve-dinner-to, but that doesn't make it easy.

I know the type out there who honestly doesn't know what they will be making for dinner until an hour before serving it. They claim it's too much of a stress to plan it out before hand.

Really?

It's more stressful than having to go to the grocery store each day to get the 2 or 3 items needed in order to get dinner on the table? Maybe these people have extra time on their hands. I am suspecting not.

My life changed when I had quadruplets. Duh. In this area, I mean. I could no longer just run to the store. Sure, I had a gazillion amazing people offering to do my shopping for me each week. And even more people who would have been happy to pick up this or that. But I wanted to run my house as independently as I could. I wanted to squeeze my own Charmin, if you know what I mean.

So meal planning was born. It was extreme in those days. I use to plan meals for a whole month. That's a lot of planning. I don't do that anymore. One week at a time is good for me. But the idea is the same, whether you do it for one week or one month.

"Honey, what do you feel like eating for dinner on May 15th?"

Since I need to get my kids up for school and then go to work, I will leave you now with one assignment. One that's pretty crucial in efficient meal planning. Yes, you can do it without it, but it's soooo much easier with it.

The master dinner list. Or whatever you want to call it.

It's a list of your dinners you make that your family likes. I keep it on the hard cardboard backing of my refrigerator calendar so it's there each week for easy reference.

I separate milchigs and fleishigs, but you can do it the best way you see fit. I add things as I try new things (spinach souffle is the new thing, thanks Chana B.). The other spinach dish got crossed off because kids stopped eating it. Turkey burgers - huge. Veggie pizza - lost its flair.

You get the idea. Jot down meals as you remember them. Get the list going. Next week we'll continue.

Good Shabbos.

Goodbye Pesach

I hope everyone had a wonderful Shabbos.

I am so happy to report that all of my Pesach things are FINALLY put away. Done. Goodbye. And not one second too soon. It was enough already. Time to move on.

I am putting the last few touches on my shopping list and menus for next year. I thank all of you that shared new recipe ideas with me. I plan on adding them to my computerized recipe file. Come next year, I hope to share a new slew of recipes, along with all of my old favorites.

As promised before Yom Tov, we will move on in the next few days to menu planning. I would like to post some easy dinner recipes as well. I would love any of your tried and true easy dinner recipes so I can share them with all. E-mail them to feldman10711@gmail.com and I will post them while we are on the menu planning topic.

A gut voch to all!

Post Pesach Wrap-Up - Part 2

Thanks for all of the great e-mails yesterday. It was so nice to hear positive feedback and about how most of you had a more organized and happy time getting ready for Pesach this year.

For those of you who requested my lists, they were all sent by 6 am this morning. If you sent the e-mail after that, I will get to you tonight. If your e-mail was sent before 6 am and you didn't receive the lists, please send another e-mail so I can try again.

I am still in Pesach mode and it's getting harder to still be there. I know that come March next year, I will be thrilled. But as of this morning, I wish everything was just put away.

To explain the lists, I want to start with the Pesach Planner. This is the (very long) shopping list that should encompass all that needs to be bought for the 8 days of Pesach.

In the first column (Have), I am going through what is left and what I plan to save and entering it.

In the second column (Buy), I am writing how many I will need to (you guessed it) buy next year.

After Yom Tov ends next year and you want to quickly pack up food items in your kitchen, you can use the Have Left column. (The Have Left column will become your Have column for the following year.)

Does this make sense?

First, I do the items I have left over that I plan to save. Then, I fill out the rest of the items on the (very long) list.

WHY DO THIS NOW???

I promise you - no matter how good of a memory you have - next year, you will not remember how many cans of crushed pineapple you used. Or how many bottles of ketchup you had left over. Or how many times you ran back to the store for matzo meal because you ran out.
(I do think I will remember the number of dozens of eggs I used. That number is so unbelievable, I don't think even my bad memory will forget it.)

"Time heals all wounds" applies to the insane amount of trips you make to the store at crazy hours of the day. All because you ran out of this or that or forgot to buy this or that.

Your memory about what worked and what didn't this year will never be clearer than it is now. I know I am beating the dead horse, but the last thing I want to be doing right now is making my shopping list for next year. Muster up all of your inner strength to stay in the Pesach mode and fill out your shopping list for next year. You will be thanking me next March.

Next list I e-mailed was the menu planner. I know, I know. I can read the e-mails I will be getting already...Isn't that a bit much to plan what you will be eating next year, RIGHT NOW??!!

Yes, it's definitely on the planning in advance spectrum which I know that some of you are not that into. Let me ask you a question? How were your meals this past Yom Tov? A roaring success? A dismal failure? Somewhere in between?

(I admit I served raw chicken during the 2nd days. Thankfully, it was my husband who noticed this first before someone else took a huge bite into the raw chicken. Fortunately, it wasn't Shabbos and I was able to put it back into the oven. And most comforting to me, was the fact that one of my guests who I served this bacteria-laden main course to, had just relayed to me that she herself served a raw roast to her family at the Seder.)

If your meals worked, why not repeat them? I don't think your family will be sick of matzo applesauce kugel between now and next year? Try not to think of repeating your Pesach food year after year as boring. Instead, think of it as family tradition. (It really does become just that, a tradition. My oldest 2 kids can tell you with 90% accuracy what I serve at both Seder meals since I don't deviate.)

Yes, I add new recipes. But I do it now. Recipes that look interesting are added now for next year. Then I adjust the shopping lists accordingly.

I take out the failures now, while I still remember them as what they are. The flops. You know, the dishes that came back to the kitchen mostly untouched.

I also write quantities. Like the meal that I made a strawberry apple kugel. I made two 9x13 pans. A huge success, everyone loved it. But not 2 pans of it. One pan was put back into the freezer and is still there. Waiting to be served to my unsuspecting children one Shabbos when they think they will be getting the chametz version, but instead, the potato starch variety will be placed in front of them. We'll see if they like it as much a month after Pesach... You get the point, make notes on your menus as to what went and what there wasn't enough of.

Pesach for next year falls out on the same days as this year. Why not just repeat your delicious menus from this past year, and tweak them to make them better for next year.

Time to get the kids moving. I will finish this up tomorrow. By Sunday, we will be done with Pesach.

Post Pesach Wrap-Up

I wonder if everyone is as tired as I am.

I know things will return to normal very soon, but I am just so tired.

It was the most beautiful Yom Tov yet. Even my oldest said that to me last night. I hope your week was just as wonderful.

Now, back to normal (whatever that means).

I am rushing off to return to work (my paying job) today, but I didn't want to miss the opportunity to mention that the more time you spend wrapping up from this Pesach, the more you will benefit next year when you make Pesach again.

There are those of you who just want to pull off the counter covers and the foil and get everything shoved back in the basement and not look at it for one more second. I understand that type. I actually would like to do that as well. It's amazing while it lasts, but when it's over, good-bye.

I truly have to muster every bit of strength to properly wrap-up, pack-up, and inventory everything. Even harder, I then make my shopping lists and menus for next year.

Sounds crazy? Maybe. But it makes so much sense and will honest to goodness change the way you prepare for Pesach next year.

If you haven't gotten my blank lists (menu planner and shopping list) and would like them, send an e-mail to feldman10711@gmail.com and I will send it to you tonight after the kids are sleeping. I will give more details and suggestions about filling them out tomorrow.

Have a great day!

Chag Kasher V'Sameach!

Just wanting to wish you a Chag Kasher V'Sameach. Have an enjoyable and meaningful Yom Tov.

I hope that you are entering into this Yom Tov at least a little bit happier and more organized than in past years.

After Yom Tov, I will go over some tips to make next year even easier while you are in the clean-up mode.

After that, by several e-mail requests, we will switch gears to meal planning.

In the meantime, savor each and every moment of Pesach. You all worked so hard to get to this point. Now it's time to enjoy!

See you when it's all over!

4 Days to Go

I have gotten the same question by e-mail several times over the past few days which I would like to pass on:


What do you feed your kids in the days leading up to Pesach???

The answer is...CHAMETZ.

There is this phenomenon about children and eating kosher l'Pesach food one moment sooner than required - starvation sets in. It's quite amazing. They eat (a lot), yet they claim they are starving. How to solve this problem? Feed them bread, bagels, pretzels...anything chametz.

After the house is "turned over", the chametz goes in a box and stays on the deck until the morning of bedikas chametz. The kids eat it as they please. Miraculously, there are no more "There's nothing to eat" complaints.

As much as we daven for rain everyday, these next 4 days are the ones where I beg for no precipitation. We eat outside as many times as we can.

Happy cleaning and cooking!

7 Days to Go

We are in the final countdown.

Some random tips:

• Take a picture of cabinets before you empty them if you are one of those people who feel as if you never know where to put things back once Pesach is over. Then you have to just scroll through the pictures on your camera after Yom Tov for a quick clean up. You can even delegate this job once they have a picture to follow.
• Don't forget about the good storage space in your dishwasher(s). Fill it up as you empty out cabinets - it doesn't have to be organized neatly as if you were running it. Pile and stack and shove some more things in there before you seal it up. (Don't forget to lock it, especially if you have a 3 year old like I have.)
• Make sandwiches for the next week and freeze them and double bag them. This way, you just have to pull them out of the freezer come lunchtime when everyone is hungry and send them outside to eat.

Keep smiling (even when you don't feel like it) and get your required sleep. I promise, they both make a huge difference.

Sleepless in Silver Spring

Good (early) morning. The night turned into the morning at some point with a tiny bit of sleep. My biggest request of the day is to make it through the day.

This is my last night of less than 6 hours of sleep (I hope...).

After a good Shabbos rest, my plan (we all know about making plans) is to make it my goal for the remaining 8 nights until the Seder to get 6 hours of sleep. It's not the ideal 7 for me, but it's enough for a good, functioning level.

My biggest piece of advice for this week is to get enough sleep. You may need more or less than I do, but find the number of hours that works for you and make it a goal. Set a timer. Make reminder notes. Whatever it takes - just get into bed at the hour that you pre-determined to be bedtime this week.

What happens if I am in the middle of such-and-such and the time has come for bed?

LEAVE IT!!! I promise you, it will still be there in the morning. Unless you are married to a saintly spouse who will finish it off for you, your cleaning/cooking/kashering will greet you when the sun comes up. By depriving yourself of your sleep, you will most likely be:

• less efficient
• more cranky
• more likely to snap at your spouse
• less patient with your children
• more overwhelmed
• not so joyful (putting it mildly) about preparing for Pesach

Another strong suggestion is to eat 3 balanced meals. Protein, carbs, fat at each one. This is another way to improve productivity and stabilize moods by keeping your "engine" properly fueled.

Have an enjoyable and restful Shabbos!

I have attached a great article written by a local woman here in Silver Spring. A loyal blog reader forwarded it to me from the Aish website. Thanks!


Ten Tips for Reducing Pesach Pressure

Where have you been?

SORRY! I disappeared for 2 weeks. I've gotten several "Where have you been?" e-mails.

I didn't mean to desert you at this most hectic and crazed time of the year, it's just that...

...I've been Pesach cleaning
...I gave a Pesach preparations class which required some preparation
...I've been cooking for Pesach
...I've given some "private tutorials" over the phone helping with Pesach preps
...I've been Pesach cleaning
...I went to Cancun
...I've been cooking for Pesach

(I tried to slip the Cancun trip in without much notice, but YES, hubby and I went to Cancun!!! It was a work trip, but not much work done. At lot of rest and relaxation.)

My freezers are filling up. My lists are coming along.

How are you all doing? Tired? Overwhelmed?

Hang in there! 2 days until Shabbos, and then you can catch up on some sleep. 12 days to the Seder...we're almost there!!!

SIMPLIFY. SIMPLIFY. SIMPLIFY.

Serve cereal for dinner tonight if you have nothing else planned.

After this Shabbos, don't use dishes. Just throw aways. Not so great for the environment, but very good for our sanity.

Use nice paper for this Shabbos so clean-up is a breeze.

Clean your dining room before Shabbos and eat in the kitchen this week (if that's at all humanly possible). Motzai Shabbos clean-up is so quick with no dining room to clean up, and its one less thing to do next week.

Bagels and eggs make an easy dinner as well.

Daven for good weather so you can feed the family outside next week.

Try to get no less that 6 hours of sleep each night. If you do get less than that, take a catch up nap the next day if possible.

SMILE. Your kids are taking sub-conscious notes on how you prepare for Pesach. Even if you are not so happy, fake it till you make it.

You are doing great! Keep it up.

Why is this night different from all other nights?

Because tonight marks the 4 week mark until the seder.

4 weeks from tonight we will be getting ready to usher in Pesach by lighting the candles in our very clean and sparkling homes.

We just need to get there.

We left off before Purim with our calendars. Now that you have yours ready, and your list of rooms to be cleaned(see post from 2/24), it's time to put them on the calendar and give them deadlines.

First thing is to merge your family calendar with your Pesach cleaning calendar. The way to do that is to first write down your appointments, your carpools, any days the kids have off of school or early dismissals, and any other random thing that is going to consume your time in the next 4 weeks.

Next step is to actually work backwards. Set a goal for when you want your kitchen to be turned over and write that on your calendar.

For example, if you want your kitchen to be kashered by Thursday night, and it takes you 3 days to accomplish this, write "kitchen" on Tuesday (3/23), Wednesday (3/24), and Thursday (3/25).
Now cross off the 3 lines where you have written "kitchen".

Continue to work backwards. The next logical thing for me to do BEFORE the kitchen is to have the living room and dining room done. I need and have allotted 2 days for these rooms. So I will put them on the calendar for 2 days, Sunday (3/21) and Monday (3/22). Now cross off the 2 entries for "living room" and "dining room".

Keep filling in your calendar, working backward, until all items on your cleaning list are crossed off and have a due date.

It's very important to truly think it through before your assign a room a date. If your kids are home from school on a particular day, it may be setting yourself up for failure if your hope to get the playroom cleaned on that day.


***Note for women who have full-time jobs outside of the home in addition to their full-time jobs inside the home:

This time of the year is particularly rough on us (I am including myself since I fall into this category). Ultimately, we have to do a full day's worth of tasks after already putting in 8 or so hours of work (plus any commute) into our paying job. This usually means giving up on some sleep (which may already be lacking) or some other important necessity. DON'T DESPAIR. Try very hard not to complain (your kids will take note of this), and do the best you can. It's only 4 weeks and the reward is immeasurable!


Try and finish your calendars by tomorrow night so you have the most amount of time to start cleaning.

As always, e-mail or post questions.

A Freilichen Purim!

A Happy Purim to all of the readers of this blog.
I wish you only good things and much hatzlacha in the pursuit of The Happy Home.

Pesach Cleaning

This is for real.

No more winter cleaning. No more spring cleaning. This is Pesach cleaning.

Once the shaloch manos baskets and bags are emptied and put away, once the costumes are packed up to be stored for another year, and once the house is back in normal working order - THERE IS NO MORE SPRING CLEANING THAT TAKES PLACE IN MY HOUSE.

None.

Any cleaning that gets done is true Pesach cleaning. (My husband will argue with this statement, saying that there are still things I am cleaning that are not true areas of chametz. That the shelves in the wall unit don't have chametz and we won't be eating there, etc...) But you get the point.

There should be no organizing of closets, no flipping of mattresses, no cleaning out file cabinets. If you have a lot of time on your hands and/or you are hiring a lot of help to do this for you, by all means, knock yourself out with all of those tasks and more. If, however, you are like me and are juggling a gazillion things each day and you are wondering how Shabbos will be prepared this week, let alone sitting down to a seder in 4 and 1/2 weeks from now, head my advice -
CLEAN ONLY WHAT NEEDS TO BE CLEANED.

If you are wondering how you can possibly clean your closets for Pesach when they are so disorganized and overflowing with clothes? You can. Without that much difficulty.

Basically, the time has passed for spring cleaning. (Don't worry, you will get your time again when busy season is over. The mess will be still be waiting for you.)

Once Purim ends, you have 4 weeks. Only time for the essentials.

You have your calendar, right? If not, see last post.

Take a piece of paper and make a list of the rooms that need to get cleaned before you usher in the Festival of Freedom. Each line will be equivalent to one day's worth of work. So if it takes you 3 days to do your kitchen, give it 3 lines and break it down by specifics in that room.

My list went like this:

1. Master bedroom and bathroom
2. Girls' Bedroom
3. Hall Bathroom, "Hole in the Hall", Girls' Bathroom
4. Living Room
5. Dining Room
6. Den Couch and open shelves
7. Den Cabinets and Hallway
8. Yitzi's room
9. Guest Room, bathroom, hallway, gemach closet
10. Laundry room and Basement Hallway
11. Boys' Room and Bathroom
12. Rec Room and storage room
13. Kitchen - ovens and refrigerator
14. Kitchen - rest of kitchen
15. Turn over kitchen

You want to aim for less than 20 entries, because if you start cleaning on Monday, you have 20 days (I didn't include Friday or Shabbos as days even if you can get things done on motzsai Shabbos.)

Get your list written. Walk through your house if you need to so you don't forget any major rooms.

Tomorrow we will make your calendar.

Surprisingly, I wasn't "yelled at" for moving to Pesach planning yet. I did get the same technical question from a few - "Where do you print calendars?"

Below is a calendar webpage that I set up an account for:

http://www.keepandshare.com/myhome/

Account Name: jewishhappyhome

Password: organized

Click on the "calendar" tab at the top.

Select Month, Week, or Day View.

Make sure you have the right dates on top.

Print.

Now you have your blank calendars.

Later, we will start to fill them in. Have a good day.

Moving Right Along

I am moving onto Pesach now.

No, I am not finished with everything for Purim. My shalch manos will need to be assembled at the last minute (out of character, I know). I still need to purchase part of it that also has to be bought toward the end of the week. 5 out of 7 kids have costumes ready; the other 2 are on their own. I have an evening this week set aside to make my contributions for our Purim seuda (it's the one Yom Tov of the year where we go as guests!!!). But that's pretty much it - I have my list of to-do's, and I know which days I plan to do them. Nothing else to stress or worry about. Yes, it's a busy week. But I feel like it's all manageable.

Purim is one day that you can choose to make yourself crazy or not. There are very little requirements you MUST do. If you choose to make creative and/or stunning themed shaloch manos, so be it. If your Purim seudah is elaborate and gourmet, again, it's your choice. However, you can also do simple. You can do store-bought. You can be practical.

Pesach, on the other hand, is a very different story.

There are MANY requirements which are not optional. How fancy the food you cook is a moot point after all of the hours and days you spend getting there. (Sadly, some people don't even have the time or energy left to cook and have to do much of that on Yom Tov.)

The way to get to Pesach in a sane and functioning state is to start now. (If you simply can't think about this before Purim is over in a week from now, stop reading and come back in 7 days and read what you've missed.) Otherwise, get ready for the most organized and happy Pesach preparations yet.

The first thing I recommend is that you get a binder or notebook to keep all of your Pesach things together. (Thank you to Chani Mendlowitz for teaching me all about the Pesach notebook and entrusted me with hers so I could start mine.) I started with my notebook in 1997 and it worked beautifully until recently. I just switched over to a binder since the pages of the notebook were starting to tear. (As I've mentioned, I am transferring all of my recipes that were collected all of these years in that notebook to the computer, and I am looking forward to sharing as soon as I finish.)

The first section should be "Cleaning". This section should be customized to work for you, but for tonight, let's start with the basics.

Go to your computer and find a way to print out calendars. For February, just print off a month view. (There's only a week left and there's not much available time to devote to Pesach preps with Purim a week away.) For March, print a month view and then print week by week. For 1-2 weeks before Pesach, I print single day calendars for major lists of the myriad of last minute things. Again, you will do what works for you. Try it this way, and see what you think.

To recap for tonight:

- Get yourself a binder or a notebook
- Print off your blank calendar pages

Post any questions or e-mail. We'll continue with cleaning tomorrow.

Moving the Bins

I have written all about "the bins". I have gotten several e-mails from people who have started, or plan to start, implementing "the bins" system in their homes.

The bins have just been moved. Only temporarily, though.

For 11 months of the year, the laundry room stands alone. But from now until Pesach, the laundry room becomes less of a focus, and the Pesach kitchen becomes the highlight.

This is a very exciting time of the year in my house, where the excitement for all of the upcoming Yamim Tovin becomes palpable.

But it's hard to do laundry.

Everything gets moved out into the hallway of the basement, and it gets, let's just say, a little untidy looking. I will be honest, this is the time of the year when the bins are on display, and they can drive me a bit crazy. The get full and clothes hang out, and it's all I see when I am in my basement.

I want them emptied everyday, but I hate nagging..."Empty your bins!"

This year, I tried a poem. I hung it up on the wall next to the bins' temporary location. I didn't say anything to the kids about my desire for them to empty their bins more frequently. But you know what happened? They saw the poem this morning, they read it, and...they emptied their bins! Like magic. It was so effective, I am thinking of quiting my day job to become a poet and hang up signs all over the house. I would never have to ask for anything to get done. I would...

Seriously...

It really did work. I attached it below. Have a restful Shabbos. Keep plugging along with your Purim list. When Sunday comes around and you are behind schedule, re-evaluate your list and see what you can eliminate. 10 more days...

Good Shabbos.



It's so exciting; it's that time of year,
When the time for Pesach draws very near.

You will notice that your bins have been moved,
I hope to a place where you will approve.

The laundry room now has to share,
But there will be no shouts of, "That's not fair!"

The Pesach kitchen is open and it's time to cook,
I hope you will stop by to visit and take a look.

But when you come down to say "hi" each day,
Please empty your bins and take the clean laundry away.

When the clean clothes are taken out of their bins,
It will surely bring to Mommy's face a very big grin.

Thank you to my wonderful children for lending a hand,
Hashem is so proud of you, your mitzvos are surely grand!

Back to Normal

The kids are (finally) back to school. The house is (finally) returning to normal (except for a leaky ceiling from an ice dam).

Did anyone ever hear of an ice dam before this winter???

It's time to kick it into high-gear for those of you who are operating at a regular pace.

12 days to Purim.

Take 10 minutes and make a list on a clean piece of paper entitled:
"To-Do's for Purim".

Include everything - whatever needs to be done for shaloch manos, anything that needs to be cooked or bought for the Purim seudah, anything costume related, tzedakah checks, etc.

After you have gone over your list to ensure no task (no matter how small) was omitted, put a day or date next to each item.

That's your due date, your deadline.

This is one of my strategies for stress prevention - write it down. This is not a new concept, but people often underestimate its power.

Stress builds up when you have too many things flying around in your brain. This causes you to be completely overwhelmed at the plausibility of actually accomplishing all of those things.

By writing the items on paper in the form of a list and giving them a due date, you are removing these seemingly IMPOSSIBLE tasks from your brain and making them POSSIBLE.

Look over the list. There are a ton of things, but each item has a day for you to do it. (Try to schedule as many of those tasks before Purim, so you can actually ENJOY Purim.

You know what needs to get done, you know when you are going to do it. Hopefully, some stress has been lifted.

Now get a good night's sleep, and start tackling the list tomorrow.

The Calm After the Storm(s)

I got an e-mail last night that I have inserted below, with permission, and with all identifiers removed:

"Thank you for the detailed laundry information. I am in need of some serious help with the upcoming 'busy season' as you always call it. I am feeling overwhelmed and not looking forward at all to Purim and Pesach approaching. I started with closets when you did, but I don't feel like I've gotten anywhere. I am ready to give up. HELP!"

I called up this wonderful woman last night and she was completely losing it. LOSING IT. Not as much from the upcoming "busy season" I suppose, but probably because her kids have been home since noon last Friday. We've been snowed in here for an unprecedented amount of time - it's enough to drive anyone mad.

My house, until we made a serious effort to clean up for Shabbos last night, was a DISASTER! Boots, gloves, hats, scarves (mostly wet) decorated my entire entrance way. Toys and games that kept most kids occupied, were not really put away well. (Actually - not put away at all.) Bedrooms were all a mess. The kitchen...don't want to go there. (Breakfast, lunch, and dinner and snacks for 7 days for 9 people...you get the idea.)

OF COURSE YOU ARE FEELING OVERWHELMED!

Take this Shabbos to relax. On Motzai Shabbos, sit calmly after everyone has gone to sleep and focus on the upcoming week.

It's 2 weeks until Purim -

Everything that can be bought or made ahead of time should be done. If not, make this a priority.

It's 6 weeks until Pesach -

Even if you don't normally think in advance, try to. For example, on Sunday, I plan to make 3 batches of challah. I will then clean my mixer and put it away until after Pesach. If you make the same menu most weeks for Shabbos, this is the time to double, triple, or quadruple the recipe and stick it in the freezer (even if you are a freezer-phobe). The less time you have to spend on Shabbos preparations in the few weeks before Pesach, the more time you will have to get ready for Pesach.

Think about ways to make your life easier in the next 6 weeks -

*If you don't have regular cleaning help, think about getting some to help with the heavy cleaning (oven, refrigerator, freezer, or even just a crew to do a thorough cleaning of the house 2 weeks before).

*If you have regular cleaning help, maybe schedule a couple of additional days to help with the above.

*If you don't normally purchase convenience foods, plan those into your menus 1-2 times/week to free up those hours normally spent preparing dinner doing other jobs.

*Another way to make Shabbos preparations easier is to do a "home and home" (that's what my friend, Peninah, calls it). Team up with a friend or neighbor and split Shabbos with them. Your family goes out on Friday night to them, they come to you Shabbos day, or vice versa. It's SO much easier to make double the food for one meal than to make less food for 2 meals.

*2-3 weeks before Pesach, I use disposable dishes. After Shabbos, there is no clean-up, and you can go right in preparations instead of first cleaning up. If you don't normally use disposable tablecloth covers, use them a few weeks before. It really saves time with the laundry.


Most importantly, take a deep breath. We all get there at the same time. The goal is to stay sane and happy. Stay tuned next week for more Pesach organizing tips. Good Shabbos.

Laundry FAQs

1. Do your kids really sort the laundry everyday?

Yes!

2. How is there room in that bin for towels and sheets?

Sheets don't get folded in our house. Each bed has ONE set of sheets. For real. (I have a bag on top of a closet with a few random sheets, just in case. But we RARELY touch that bag.) When the sheets need to get washed, they get stripped in the morning and washed and then get put right back onto the bed at night. I feel that the cumulative amount of time I have saved by not folding sheets is tremendous. Besides, I hate folding fitted sheets!

(For middle-of-the-night gastrointestinal "situations", the sheets go into the washing machine and we put that child on blankets on the floor. They are too sick to care where they sleep.)


My towel "policy" is pretty similar. One towel per person per week. Each bathroom has a hook for each person who uses that particular bathroom. Each person is responsible for hanging up his or her towel after each shower. Once a week, the towels are collected, washed, and dried. The towels are then returned to their respective hooks. No folding, no sorting. Another huge benefit - I don't have a linen closet. I was able to convert it to another clothes closet, which is a much more valuable commodity.

(Yes, I have extra towels. They, too, are in an XL Ziploc bag on the top of the closet for times when we need extra towels.)

(4 towels in my house are reserved for guest use only. They are folded and left on a shelf in the bathroom.)


3. How do you have room to hang all of the clothes in your house? Do you have huge closets? How are the bars configured? Can your kids reach the bars?

We have 5 closets in my house designated for clothes (one of those used to be the linen closet, as I previously mentioned). One of those closets is large (shared by 3 girls). The other 4 are small to average in size. Each closet has been maximized for space. There are double hangs in all. (That answers the kid question - everyone can reach the lower bars, only the 2 oldest can reach the top bars.)

Is there enough room? YES. If you are finding that there is not enough room in your closets for all the clothes to hang, ask yourself the following:

1. Is the closet using all of the space available in an efficient manner?


Yes - see #2

No - there are many affordable, do-it-yourself options available. Clothes closets don't need expensive shelving to make them efficient. They usually just need double hang bars to double your hanging space. If handy genes don't run in your family, buy the materials and hire a handy-man to install. You don't need to have closets professionally done. (Although, I had my closets done by a local closet company years before I ever bought a real sofa. I still don't have a bedroom set. But, my closets are very nice.)


2. Are the clothes in the closets really being worn?

Yes - see below.

No - see blog entry from January 7.


I may have written this before (or even more than once), but I firmly believe that people who can't get a handle on their houses have TOO MUCH STUFF. Closets are the secret hiding places for pack-rats. By having just what you need, it will really eliminate the clutter. I know that is obvious, but it does take effort to get rid of things.

I have never regretted ANYTHING I have gotten rid of. I never once thought, "I wish I would have kept ___________".

Try it. You really won't regret it.

We've Got (the) Power!

It's been a week since my last post. So much has happened. Where to begin?

I went to New York last weekend with 3 friends. We had a blast - we shopped, we dined, we pampered. Then we attended a wedding in Lakewood.

Thursday night was Sheva Brochos in my house. Then came the clean up and the mad rush to get ready for Shabbos (nothing done ahead of time last week).

Then came the snow. And the snow. And some more snow. Almost 30 inches!!! In my life, I have never seen so much snow.

This scenario is something I have dreamt about - tons of snow so I am stuck in my house and, therefore, be able to accomplish so many items on my "list".

I had quite the list. I was going to finish spring/winter cleaning in the last bedroom. I was going to continue to work on typing my Pesach recipes and saving them on my computer. I was going to bake 3 batches of challah which would take me until Pesach. That was just the first day.

Der mensch trakht un Gott lahkht.

Better known as - Man plans, and God laughs.

We lost power.

No lights, no heat, no mixer for challah, no vacuum for cleaning, no computer for recipes.

Nothing.

Instead of productivity, I got dishwashers full of dirty dishes that couldn't be run. I had a sink piled high of dirty dishes. I had a house with piles of blankets needed in order to keep warm. I had mess all over the place - who wanted to pick anything up off the floor, we were too cold to care.

BUT...

Instead of productivity, we got to spend the first evening of no power playing family games at the kitchen table with a lantern shining the light. I got to snuggle with my kids instead of rushing to put them to bed so I can clean up the house. We got to spend the day in warmth with our close friends while all the kids played happily. At night we crashed with our dearest friends as they so graciously prepared 9 beds for each one of us to sleep in.

The power came on today. It took the entire day and evening to get back to "normal" as far as the house goes. I am so grateful to be able to sleep in my own bed tonight, with heat and electricity.

Lessons learned:

1. We are in galus. It's okay to be reminded of that and feel displaced once in a while.
(Thank you, Chana B., for that mussar.)

2. Don't set all your hopes on accomplishing the "list".

3. The "list" will still be waiting for you when the lights come back on.

4. Even in busy season, you have to stop to play games and laugh with your kids.

5. Tremendous feelings of gratitude for our amazing friends who all offered places for us to sleep.

6. Ice cream is a wonderful breakfast 12 hours after the power goes out and the freezer is just starting to thaw.


As I type, it is snowing again. I probably won't leave my house tomorrow. And yes, I have a list of things to do.

Tomorrow I will post all of the laundry questions I received via e-mail...if the power is on.

Get ready for busy season!

Tomorrow we turn the calendar page to February.

There's 7 or 8 inches of snow on the ground right now, but it's time to start thinking ahead. Purim is 4 weeks from today.

Set a deadline for yourself - before Shabbos comes around again, you will make a decision about your Shaloch Manos (if you haven't already).

Decide on your theme, or decide not to have a theme. Decide what can be bought, and what needs to be made. Decide to send mostly tzedakah cards this year. Whatever you want, but come to a decision.

Once decided, start getting all of the things you need that can be bought in advance. Avoid those awful pre-Yom Tov rushes and lines in the stores. Stop making something that's supposed to be joyful, so dreadful.

If you don't enjoy it, send cards and fulfill the mitzvah with the required 2. Don't do something because you feel you have to. Or because you are feeling peer pressure from your neighbors or from your super-woman friends.

Over the past 15 years of marriage, there were several years when I just couldn't do creative or fancy or delicious. Store-bought was just fine. Know your limitations and what is just going to put you over the edge.

It's time to get started and make decisions, so "busy season" is a lot more manageable, and dare I suggest...enjoyable.

10 Commandments of Leave-Ins

1. A fair system needs to be put into place to ensure equitable distribution of the "Who's turn is it to do the leave-ins?" question.

2. Leave-ins need to be done before breakfast is served. (Correct - nobody eats until the dryer is empty.)

3. Dish towels, tablecloths, and bibs (kitchen things that don't have a bin) need to be brought to the kitchen before breakfast and a parent will fold them/put them away.

4. A good faith attempt must be made to put the items in the correct bin (see "labeling clothes" below).

5. If you receive an item in your bin that does not belong to you, you must return it to the correct bin.

6. No fighting, yelling, hitting, kicking, or arguing at or with the person who made the "offensive" bin error. (A violation of this will be dealt with in the strictest of manners by The Management - Ta and Ma.)

7. Bins must be emptied and put away before Shabbos and whenever they are so full that no more items can be put into them.

8. Socks must be put into the sock graveyard when they come out of the dryer.

9. It's a big mitzvah to bring up the contents of "Ma and Ta's" bin when it's full and they are busy with doing the million other things that they do.

10. A good attitude about the leave-ins, the bins, and helping out in general, will be heavily rewarded with generous amounts of praise and compliments.


*A short note on labeling clothes:
I have labeled most items that go into the leave-ins. Yes, the underwear in my house is labeled. (Yes, even my husband's says "Ta".) Yes, that is a bit odd. Okay, very odd. You know what? Everyone gets the correct underwear, undershirts, pj's, etc. in his or her bin (98% of the time). Is this worth it? Absolutely.

So after you label your bins with every one's names, keep that Sharpie handy, and start labeling. You won't regret it.

The Leave-Ins

I love the leave-ins. They are effortless. They are quick. They are easy.

After they come out of the washer, they go into the dryer where they spend the night.

They are greeted in the morning by one (or more) of my children. It is then that the leave-ins begin their clean journey back to their permanent homes in their respective drawers.

The best part - I don't have anything to do with the sorting! My husband has nothing to do with the sorting! It's the kids' job, and they are responsible for the sorting. Have I convinced you to try this method?

Where do these children put all of the underwear, socks, undershirts, pjs, tights, etc.?

The answer, quite simply is - The Bins.

What are The Bins? Easiest thing is for me to show you a picture. The link below shows the exact bins that are in my laundry room. Our bins came from the Container Store, but I have seen different brands from different stores that serve the same function.

(Credit goes to Leah Marcus for the idea many years ago. She has almost double the amount of kids as I have and she came up with the brilliant idea of kids sorting their own laundry using these bins.)

http://www.containerstore.com/shop/closet/cubesBins?productId=10006897

We have 8 bins, one for each member of the family ("Ma and Ta" share a bin.) Everyone's name is written in Sharpie marker on the front of the bin.

As each piece comes out of the dryer, it gets put into the right bin. No folding or neatness involved. They just throw it in. Depending on the speed of the child, an entire load gets sorted in 5-8 minutes. When 2 kids do it, it's must faster.

(Socks are put in the sock graveyard. I will discuss socks at a later time.)

If you are the type of housekeeper that needs perfectly folded and neat laundry, this is not the system for you. If you need to have control over how neat your kids' drawers are, look elsewhere. But if you need to have a more efficient system with family participation, read on.

Next post will continue with more leave-in "policies and procedures".

What's the hang up?

To hang or not to hang? That's the question.

Here's my answer, with some questions:

Are the dresser drawers in your room or your kids' rooms stuffed? Do you frequently get frustrated by the condition of the clothes in those drawers? Are you ironing more than you'd like? Are the piles of clean clothes taking over your life? Are you or your kids doing the "getting dressed in the laundry room" thing?

Does this sound like an infomercial???

It is very hard, if not impossible, for kids to keep clothes in drawers neat. Is that really a goal anyway? To have neat drawers?

This is the happy home - not the neat drawers. We just want the process of doing laundry to be time-efficient and as easy as possible. This will make all involved in this process happy.

Keeping whatever can be put on hangers hung up is good for 4 reasons:

1. Kids can take more responsibility for their own laundry by having them be in charge of everything but their skirts, shirts, and pants.

2. You will have a more organized room when you properly utilize all hanging space.

3. Once the clothes are on hangers, the put away is just carrying them to the closet and hanging. No arranging clothes in too-small drawers, no separating clothes by room and by kid (I do this on the bar as I hang the clothes up), no folding and re-folding of clothes when the basket gets tipped over, etc.

4. Clothes look neater and less wrinkled when only put in the dryer for 20 minutes and then hung up damp to dry. I believe it also extends the life of a garment by not having it tumble in the dryer for an hour.


The hang-ups are the parents' responsibility in my house. (Although, my husband has been known to enlist the help of a child or two in the hanging process, adults generally do this job quicker, neater, and more efficiently.)

All clothes hang in the closet. If you will argue you have no closet space in your kids' rooms, I will argue that your kids have too many clothes hanging in their closet. (Remember the big question - "Have I worn this in the past year?") Too many things, too much stuff is what really gets in the way of an organized house. (Off the topic, I digress...)

Hang-ups done. Post any questions or send me an e-mail. The kids do the leave-ins. More about that with my next post.

A Work Vacation

It's been a week since my last post. I went to "work" in Tampa for 4 days. It was very exhausting...sitting in meetings and presentations all day, having very adult conversations with very smart people, and making a presentation or two. Then I had to go back to the hotel room to get into a king size bed with a least 8 pillows and a delicious down comforter. Did I forget to mention the humongous TV? No cooking, no cleaning, no laundry. No noise, no dishes, no kids. It was rough, I must say.

I brought my laptop and started a project that I've desperately been trying to do. I am typing in all of my Pesach recipes from my notebook that is nearly in tatters after making Pesach for a lot of years. I am hoping to finish by Purim. Send me an e-mail if you would like me to share the file with you when I am done.

Back to laundry.

So we established that laundry gets done everyday. Tonight, I want to start with the 2 basic loads that get done daily - the leave-ins and the hang-ups.

First come the hang-ups. To refresh your memory, the hang-ups are the ordinary pants, shirts, and skirts that we wear everyday (I don't include my work clothes in this load - those go in the delicates.)

**Disclaimer: I am not a wash expert. I don't work for Maytag, or even Tide. If you know how to wash the clothes better, by all means. It's the system that I feel works well, not necessarily the temperature of the water, the machine setting, or the detergent. I must say, though, I swear by Tide with bleach alternative!**

The hang-ups go in the machine, I run them on the delicate cycle (warm wash, cold rinse). After the load is finished, I put them in the dryer for 20 minutes on the permanent press setting.

While that starts, I empty the leave-ins basket into the machine, carefully checking to make sure there are no escapees from the other baskets that were mistakenly put into the leave-in basket. I run that load on a hot wash. After that's running, I spend a few minutes on the sock graveyard (that's a whole megilla for a different night), and then start pulling things out of the dryer to hang up.

While I am hanging a few things, the dryer keeps running, then I pull out a few more things, until it's all hung up. At some point later in the night, the leave-ins go into the dryer on a cotton towels load, and are left in (hence - leave-ins) until the morning.

I will go into the morning laundry sorting tomorrow. Also, I will talk about the reason for hanging up all of the clothes. (More work initially, less work on the back end, and much neater results.)

It's getting late, and the leave-ins have to get put into dryer.

The Daily Wash

I have a friend with a large family (8 kids) who does laundry 2-3 times a week.

I don't understand how that is possible, but she is super-organized and put together, and her kids appear to be wearing clean clothes. In her house, laundry is a project. It's one of those things that need to get done a couple of times a week and it takes time (a few hours) each time she does it.

It works for her.

That does not work for me. The point being, if your current laundry system is working for you, keep it. Don't change a thing.

It not, read on. Remember though, what works for us, may very well not work for you.

In my house, laundry is one of those daily things we must do each day. It's like brushing your teeth, packing lunches, making and serving dinner, and cleaning up the kitchen at the end of day. These things need to get done at some point every day before my head hits the pillow each night.

I can, however, go to sleep if toys are a mess in the playroom and if the dishwasher needs to be emptied. I also have no insomnia issues if the mail lies unopened or the bills need to be paid (unless of course they will be late). These are examples of things that can get done as they need to happen. There is no schedule.

Laundry needs to get done everyday. If not, the clothes appear to reproduce while we sleep and I wake up to a room where the baskets can no longer be seen because they are blanketed with clothes.

By doing it everyday, it is not "a project" - I have too many projects.

I am blessed to have a mother who has come to my house on many occasions to pitch in. With my first, she stayed a week. With my second, I got two weeks. Of course, I always wanted her to stay longer, so I had quadruplets for 3-6 and she stayed for 6 months! When I would complain about doing the laundry, she would joke, "How hard is it to do laundry??? What? Do you take it to the River Nile and beat it?" I am positive that after number 7 was born (I was bumped back down to 2 weeks), she was no longer making any laundry jokes.

It's a lot. It's a huge job. Part of the battle is to acknowledge that it is not easy to keep up (no matter how many children), and any success needs to be recognized.

Make a schedule that works for you. More importantly, stick to that schedule. No matter what. Laundry should not overwhelm you. If it does, whatever you are doing needs to be fixed.

Next post, I will tell you how it works in my house.

Baskets of Laundry

I hope everyone had their batteries recharged for another week.

It's been a couple of days, but I want to continue where we left off...with laundry. Specifically, where does all the laundry go now that it's being brought to the laundry room and not being left in baskets throughout the house???

Enter into my laundry room...oh, that's where all of the baskets are! Six to be exact.

1. Leave-ins
2. Hang-ups
3. Delicates
4. Whites
5. Dry Cleaning
6. Rags

Each basket has its name in bold, Sharpie-written letters for all to see. (My youngest is 3, of course he can't read, but still knows where the leave-ins go.)

1. Leave-ins - at least half of the laundry - these are things that are washed warm or hot and are left in the dryer (hence, leave-ins) until completely dry.
(towels, underwear, pjs, tights, socks, undershirts, etc.)

2. Hang-ups - everyday shirts, pants, and skirts - these are washed warm, put in the dryer on permanent press for about 20 minutes, and then put on hangers to dry completely.

3. Delicates - a once or twice a week wash consisting of the nicer clothes which say delicate or hand wash on the label - they are washed cold and put on hangers to dry.

4. Whites - anything that gets bleach - Shabbos tablecloths and white uniform or Shabbos shirts - this load tackles cholent, grape juice, and grass stains all at once.

5. Dry Cleaning - exactly what it says. We use this to transport our stuff to the cleaners. You can put your coupons on the bottom so they don't get lost!

6. Rags - a small basket for all the dirty rags that accumulate each week from not having a cleaning lady - this is a once a week load that gets no fabric softener (which I am told is better for cleaning rags).

For this laundry system to be successful, correct sorting is important. My kids really do this. It took some teaching in the beginning (Ma, what basket does _______ go in???), but they really got it.

Why is sorting laundry so important? Why not throw everything into one load?

It comes down to the putting-away process. That is why it is so important to sort before it gets washed.

The goal is to have clean clothes. We all have times in our lives when that is the most we can do.

A higher goal is to have clean clothes that are taken out of the laundry room and returned to their owners. In a relatively short time.

Get your baskets ready...tomorrow we start washing.

Busy Bees

We take a break from laundry and filing...

I attended the first meeting of the Tiferes group - a project of the Chafetz Chaim Heritage Foundation. Thank you to Chani Mendlowitz for opening up her home for this group.

Just to mention one short concept from the video that applies to this blog...

A comparison was made between bees making honey and having a happy home. There are so many intricate tasks involved in the process of honey making. A lot of team players, all working hard together to get the job done. Each bee has their role, no job is more important than the other. Day after day, night after night, so much goes into the production. The end result is honey, sweet and delicious.

So too, think of all the effort we put into our homes and our families. Tireless days, and many long nights. Hopefully, the end the end result is sweet as well...A Happy Home.

More on laundry tomorrow.

Introduction to Laundry

A front loading, large capacity washer and dryer stacked on top of each other to maximize space. Beautiful, clean shelves lined with Tide, Downy, and Bounce sheets. Organized baskets filled with stain removers and bleach pens. A pristine bar where the clothes hang, crisply ironed and ready for wear. A shiny counter to fold the warm clothes as they exit the dryer. Unsoiled baskets for perfectly folded garments to rest until being happily toted off to the room in which they belong.

The above is my laundry room fantasy. It is not real, but merely imagined on a daily basis.

My laundry room is not pretty. It does not belong in a magazine. The floor always needs a good washing. The inside of the washing machine could use one as well (how does that make sense?). The dripless spout on the industrial-sized Tide drips onto the top of the washer, leaving the indelible, slimy, blue residue. Some days, the sock graveyard looks mountainous, like an entire country of people went barefoot and left their socks in our laundry room. Other days, the kids' laundry bins are so full they need a crane to get the clothes back to their rooms.

This is my reality.

BUT...

6 days a week the laundry gets done.

My kids (99.7% of the time) have clean clothes to wear.

My husband and I do not fold laundry.

I do not iron (maybe 5 times in the last 15 years).

With the exception of clothes that hang in the closets, I do not put any of my kids' laundry away.

I do not bring dirty laundry into the laundry room (and I don't use a laundry shoot).


Step by step, sock by sock, your laundry system can (and will) get easier. Most importantly, the massive responsibility of laundry will not fall solely on your shoulders. It will become a family affair where each member participates at some level.

The hour is getting late, but let's start with Rule #1:

THERE ARE TO BE NO LAUNDRY BASKETS OUTSIDE OF THE LAUNDRY ROOM.

Crazy idea, huh?

Think about the amount of time you spend schlepping baskets of dirty laundry to your laundry room. Is that when the call to do laundry sounds? When those baskets are full?

If you are burdened by a lot of laundry, it usually means you are blessed with a family. It's time for the family to help.

Make the announcement in the morning, all laundry needs to be brought into the laundry room. Not left on a chair. Not shoved under the bunk bed. Not left on the bathroom floor. Into the laundry room.

How this gets done will be up to you.

In the Feldman house, the kids have worked this out. The girls who sleep upstairs take turns each week as to who brings down the laundry. Sunday they switch. The "laundry girl" brings all the girls' clothes (and her Mommy's and Tatty's as well) down to the laundry room in the morning after all are dressed, and again in the evening after pj's are donned. The boys have adopted an "each man for himself" mantra, and take care of their own (they also are either on the same floor as the laundry room, or a 1/2 flight up).

Is this a big deal? It's a huge deal. You decide to do laundry, and it's already in the laundry room. It saves time, energy, and it gets the unsightly and full laundry baskets out of the bedrooms and hallways.

You try it and see what a difference it makes.

Where do they put they laundry when they are in the laundry room? To be continued...

Mail - Part 2

It's still very quiet in my house as I type (a miracle in itself).

To continue with the conundrum of mail...

After you have sorted through and gotten rid of the junk, look through the pile you are keeping. To further reduce the paper that you will allow entry into your living space, open up all bills, letters, statements, etc. (still while standing next to the trash).

All open envelopes, bill inserts, and even return envelopes can go right into the recycle bin (everyone uses online bill pay, right???). Save only the papers you absolutely need.

Then comes the filing system.

To start off easy, designate a spot for things that need attention (to be paid, to RSVP, to call about, etc.). Then make a spot for things to be filed.

Challenge for the day - Collect all papers that are strewn around your house.

Sort into 3 piles:
1. trash/recycle/shred
2. to do's
3. to file

Take care of #1 immediately. Start working on #2. Designate a place in your home for #3, your filing system. 2 file drawers should be sufficient (for real). To be continued tomorrow...

Tonight we will start with laundry by request of a friend.

Have a good day.

The USPS is running out of money, but that doesn't mean you need to hold on to all it delivers to you...

Do you ever get overwhelmed by piles of mail? I was speaking to someone today who can't seem to take control of the mail. It is (literally) taking over her kitchen (and even bathrooms).

To avoid this problem:

SORT YOUR MAIL NEXT TO THE TRASH CAN.

It's simple. Take it out of the mailbox and walk straight to the trash can. Anything that says "presort" can be dumped.

So can the myriad number of catalogues you really will never order from. (Do not keep them if the thought of "one day..." pops into your head. You will get 4 more before that happens anyway.)

On top of those can go the dozens of free offers, gutter cover ads, and time share invitations.

DUMP THEM, RECYCLE THEM, SHRED THEM - but don't invite this unwelcome junk into your living space.

Junk mail can reproduce, and will, all over your kitchen counters and tables if you don't stop it.

I don't know about you, but this is at least 90% of my mail each day.

Tomorrow I will talk about what to do with the important stuff.

Good night. Pick out what you are wearing tomorrow before you go to bed. It will save you time in the morning.

A little progress is better than none.

A gut voch to all. Hope everyone is relaxed to start a new week.

The best laid plans...

Right after havdalah, I put up a batch of challah dough. Always good to get an early start on next Shabbos (which seems to roll around much faster than one expects).

The dough didn't rise. What a waste.

My plans for finishing up closet cleaning in my bedroom didn't happen.

But I made progress. That's the point...just do a little. It's better than nothing.

A friend sent me an email before Shabbos saying that reading about cleaning her closet WAS giving her heart palpitations. She thought that she could only take on 1/4 of it. Okay, so it takes 4 days instead of 1. That's pretty good. JUST START.

We are about 2 1/2 months away from Pesach.

Tomorrow, I plan to start tackling my shopping list. No, I am not cooking yet. Or even Pesach cleaning yet (just winter cleaning!).

I am going to get pans and paper goods tomorrow and store them packed up in bags in my basement. I will certainly beat the pre-Yom Tov rush, and I will spread out the exorbitant expense of Pesach. The 9x13 tins certainly won't spoil, but it will be 1 less thing to do a few weeks before Yom Tov.

My plan is to figure out how to post files on this blog so I share my Pesach lists. I will let you know when that happens.

Have a productive Sunday.

Cleaning Closet #1 - postmortem

It's done. 1 closet. It feels good. There are many more to go, but it is important to focus on the accomplishment of beginning a task.

A couple of notes about what I found last night:

A lot of dust. How does so much dust collect in a closet? Why don't the doors keep it out?

Crutches - these are an exception to the "Have I worn this in the past year" rule. I am thanking God everyday that I haven't had to use them, but still keep them as an odd kind of ayin hara protection. No, you cannot apply this logic to your fat clothes you are keeping, you know, just in case.

Holey underwear. Does this need a comment? Are you going to sew them, or is this for some kind of primitive ventilation system?


I hope everyone has a restful Shabbos. Tomorrow night, my plan is to move on to another closet and maybe the armoire (thanks, Ann!).

It's all about getting started. You can do it.

I need to lose 20 lbs. to fit into that sweater...

And 10 lbs. (okay maybe 15) to wear that jacket.

Oh! I love that suit! I can't wait to wear it again. Maybe after 3 months in the gym.

Uh huh...


This is not about weight loss. I won't go there. Maybe one day, but not tonight.

Tonight, it is time to go into your closet (or closets if you are very lucky). I started on Tuesday. Wednesday I was busy with other things, but tonight I am headed back in to finish a closet (if not, my room is going to be quite the mess on Shabbos).

Remove everything. EVERYTHING. Really, everything.

Get a rag (or 7) and start spritzing away. Wipe down every surface. Now get the vacuum . Vacuum the bottom. Don't forget the corners.

Take a step back and admire your work. Inhale the fresh smell. Look at this amazingly clean closet. Emptying and cleaning shouldn't take you long at all.

Now turn around. Mount Everest right in your bedroom. Now comes the hard part...putting it all back.

(At this point you need to think about the following before you proceed...this is only hard the first time. I promise. After the first year of good spring closet cleaning, it will get easier.)

The following takes a lot of discipline for you closet hoarders out there. With each item you pick up from the heaping mound of clothes, you must ask yourself the following question:

HAVE I WORN THIS IN THE PAST YEAR?

You can't lie. You can't make excuses. You need to be honest.

If the answer to the above question is "no", you need to say good-bye. Au revoir. Sayonara. Adois. Auf Wiedersehen. Shalom.

If the answer is "yes", return it to the closet. The "no"s should be put into trash bags. Donate to an organization that gives you a tax-deduction. Give them to a gemach. (Only current styles, please. No gemach wants your large-print, indigo and plaid over-sized sweater you once wore with teased hair and frosted pink lipstick.) Do something with them, but get them out of your closet.

I know this is causing heart palpitations. I know some of you are trying to convince yourselves that you are really going to lose all that weight this year and get back into those clothes.

Really? You know when those pounds are shed you are no way going to wear that skirt again. You are definitely buying a new skirt. And shirt to match. Really you are.

Post your issues with closet cleaning. Let's come up with a solution. I am going to finish closet #1 right now. My bags are ready.

Why Spring Cleaning Should be called Winter Cleaning

Right now it is freezing outside. I am a person who would much rather be cold than hot, and even I am having issues with this weather. Oh, and the forecasters say that an Arctic blast is heading our way for the weekend. Huh? It's not already here???

A couple of my kids came home from school this week and asked to put on their pajamas. At 5 pm. !?! There's no playing outside when it feels like 5 or 10 degrees. The bikes are tucked away, the swing set looks lonely, and the neighbors' trampoline still has snow on it from the big blizzard of '09.

NOBODY WANTS TO GO OUTSIDE.

This is the time to be in the house. When the trees and flowers bloom in the spring, who wants to be cleaning the cobwebs? Or the 7 inches of dust that have made their happy home under the bed? Or my favorite, the ring around the honey that seems to be crazy glued to the pantry that needs brute strength to remove it, you think you have definitely taken some of the shelf with it.

Another big deal - this is the Jewish Happy Home blog. Have you noticed what has been noticeably absent these past 2-3 months? And what's not going to be here for almost another 2 months?

The holidays. The Yamim Tovim. The Chagim. Whatever you call them - they are not here. While it makes some sigh with longing and others leap for joy, this is our reality. This is the time that we have to be doing things other than dipping apples, building sukkos, polishing menorahs, frying latkes, covering counter tops, and whipping up cheesecakes and blintzes.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT PESACH CLEANING.

This is about doing the things we stress about doing at the time when we should be doing real Pesach cleaning and preparations. We've heard it a million times - dust is not chametz. Yet, we all (myself included) often forget that as we stay up until all hours of the nights preceding our Festival of Freedom. To become slaves to projects that could have been done at a much quieter time of the year.

This is about getting our houses together. We need to start now so it can be done in a manageable way. Fine, we'll start after the kids go to bed...

The Happy Home

I have been asked many times to start a blog. On what??? "You know, organizing. Running a house."

Yes, my house is organized (most days). Yes, my meals are planned in advance (most weeks). Yes, Erev Shabbos in my house is fairly calm (most weeks).

Does this make me an expert in running a home? Certainly not. However, I am blessed with certain strengths, and there is a sense of responsibility to share them with others. After my Aunt Irene called me and told me that I absolutely must start a blog (the whole world must be blogging now after Julie and Julia), I finally acquiesced.

Why "The Happy Home"? Why not "The Organized Home" or "Cook for Shabbos on Wednesday"?

An organized home is really not the goal. It is a means to achieve the goal. What is the goal? Haha...don't think I am going to expound on the purpose of creation in a blog. But I will say, the way to accomplish our purpose here is best done by living in a HAPPY HOME.

What is happiness? Another haha...philosophers for thousands of years all have different ideas. Wikipedia defines happiness as "a state of mind or feeling characterized by contentment, love, satisfaction, pleasure, or joy". That sounds goods to me.

Practically speaking, you KNOW what a happy home is.

It's when everybody gets out in he morning and gets to where they need to go - on time, with relatively clean clothes, and with whatever they need to get through their day (lunch, homework, trip money, etc.) - without screaming or tears.

It's when the kids come home at the end of the day and they ask you "What's for Dinner?" - and you ACTUALLY have an answer for them, AND it will be able to be served before those same kids start eating the expensive "school only" snacks you just bought from Costco, AND you don't need to go to the store first to get the ingredients to make that dinner.

It's when you finally get those kids to bed, and you are able to get the house back to baseline (you know, how it was in the morning before they all woke up) without tears of exhaustion and frustration and the feeling of not having accomplished anything that day.

Dictionary.com defines happy as "favored by fortune; fortunate or lucky" - that's a happy home. It's time to get happy. It's time to pull our houses, and ourselves, together. We'll do it together.